There’s no denying that our society is becoming more and more open towards trying out new experiences in the bedroom. Whether that’s surprising your partner with a new adult toy or trying out a different pose than usual, the sex-positive world we’re currently living in is a real breath of fresh air. Gone are the days when there was a lot of stigma surrounding this topic and instead there’s an open-minded and curious nature that’s slithered its way into our minds.
Among those sex-positive practices is the much-talked-about pegging scenario. This is by no means a new practice in heated moments, but given the honest conversations we’re all having about adult fun, it’s no surprise that it’s taking centre stage. And at the heart of this activity is, of course, strap on dildo.
Since we all have different ideas of what’s pleasurable and exciting, it only makes sense that there is a wide range of dildos with strap on designs. When you’re trying to cut through the noise and decide on a model for yourself, there are a few things that can influence that outcome.
Most people assume that dildos with strap on designs come with, well, straps. And while that’s a fairly logical and expected assumption, it doesn’t actually stop there. Yes, you do have the classic harness-style models which come with adjustable straps that wrap around your waist and keep the dildo in place. These are often seen as a good middle ground for newcomers and experienced sex toy enthusiasts alike.
Next up, we have the underwear style of strap on, which is exactly what it sounds like. Instead of featuring straps to keep it in place, the dildo is attached to a pair of undies that you basically just slid on with minimal fuss. As such, they’re particularly handy for beginners who are just getting the hang of things, as well as people who don’t want to deal with any unnecessary buckles.
And finally, and somewhat ironically, we have strapless strap ons. These scrap the harness system altogether and instead opt for a dual function on both ends to double up on the fun. Basically, you have a longer shaft which is used for pegging and then at the other end, you get a smaller pony which is inserted into the wearer’s vagina. Essentially, you’re getting the penetrative feeling on both ends and you don’t have any additional materials hanging around your waist.
Some people are fans of the vibrating features that some dildos offer because it increases sensation and sexual pleasure in a very unique way. On the flip side, others are more keen on the natural motions and sensations experienced during sex, so vibrations can be somewhat off-putting. Think about what you’re more comfortable with and decide accordingly. Plus, you can always get a vibrating version just to try it out and if you don’t like the way it feels, just keep it off the next time you use it. It’s as simple as that.
No matter how much we keep saying that size doesn’t matter and it’s the technique that’s the real deal-breaker – it’s not entirely true. And we all have various preferences when it comes to size, not only because we have different ideas of what feels good, but also because all vaginas have different shapes and walls.
Luckily, you can freely choose the size of your dildo without anyone’s feeling getting hurt. You can go as big or small as you’d like, just make sure it’s not painful or uncomfortable when you slide it in. After all, bigger doesn’t always mean better.
Now this is where the technique comes more into play. Much like vaginas, penises can take on a number of shapes – from slightly crooked to entirely straight – and dildos can effectively mimic that natural phenomenon. Plus, dildos have the added bonus of additional customization, with some models featuring ribbed or veiny designs, while others take on a smoother approach.
As for the colour, you can definitely play around with a spectrum of hues. You don’t have to stick to the natural, skin-coloured tone of human penises – you can opt for a number of playful options like pink, blue, green and even a few multi-coloured options. They all basically serve the same purpose, so don’t feel pressured into choosing something just to abide by societal standards.
Last but not least, you need to make sure the materials that the dildo is made of are sex-safe because otherwise, you could potentially deal with irritations, allergies and even infections. The list of sex-approved materials includes silicone, stainless steel, glass, Pyrex and ABS plastic. These are all non-porous materials that won’t act as magnets for bacteria.
On the other hand, the list of big no-nos consists of thermoplastic rubber (TPR), thermoplastic elastomer (TPE) and polyvinyl chloride (PVC). These are, you guessed it, porous materials that are basically a playground for festering bacteria to build and latch on to. If you’re going to buy something like this, make sure to use a condom every time you use it and be extra careful when cleaning and drying it afterwards.